Friday, January 13, 2012

A Truth

I have a little story for you today.
I have been praying for something for a long time.
I have been asking God for something for a long time.
I have been working towards that goal, that dream of mine, for a long time.

Three weeks, for the third time getting this close to that dream, the door was quietly shut.
And God said, no.

I don't mind telling you about the dream of mine.
It was to have my artwork licensed.
I've dreamed of walking into Hallmark or a specialty gift shop and see my artwork as greeting cards, home decor, stationary, plaques, etc.
I have worked very hard to reach that goal, like I've said.
I've spent a lot of time and money traveling, working, trying to fit myself in...
I kind of had my whole self-image as an artist wrapped up in that scheme.
It was kind of like I had told myself, "as soon as you are licensed THEN you will really be an artist".

It has taken me over five years to call bullsh*t on that way of thinking.

This time when God said no, I got it.
I already am who i am.  I am an artist already.
I am an artist because God gave me the desire, the passion, the ability to create.
Whether or not anyone buys my art.
Whether I have 1000 sales in my etsy shop or 0.
Whether or not a large company wants to manufacture my work and sell it all over the world.
I am an artist.

Today I have a new prayer.
"God, please help me be authentic.
Please help me be real.
Please let me make my art in a way that pleases you.
In a way that serves you.
In a way that allows me to follow your path, whatever way that path leads.
Please help me listen carefully to your truth.
Please help me seperate my ego from your voice."

It's a new truth for me.
And it feels really good to let go.
Because when you are dreaming of something, and it doesn't feel good, or right anymore, I think maybe it's God way of telling you to let go.

Have a beautiful weekend, my friends.
See you on Monday.

Oh! and the print is now available here:)



faith from within said...

quite a big step in an amazing new direction my friend. can't wait to see what's in store for you now! big love to you today!!

Circle said...

From the very first moment you picked up a pencil you were an artist - I'm glad you feel truly happy as what you are, I adore your work and it wouldn't make a difference where you sold your stuff, I would still love it no matter what!
I have never exhibited or sold my stuff yet I know in my own wee simple way I'm an artist - and I am so inspired by your work!

Creatively Content said...

Thank you for this post.

Jodi@ said...

you are an artist and I'm so glad God revealed that fact to you!

God blesses us in ways we don't expect. And HE blessed me through this post. Thank you!

Biz said...

I'm sorry that the answer was 'no', but knowing that God has a bigger plan for your beautiful work is a blessing and I can't wait to see where he and it leads you.
I love the bird's beautiful!


Momma Bug said...

And look how that very real piece of who you are blesses people all over the place!
I am inspired by your art friend - it's so happy!
Been picking up my colors more lately because of you.

Thanks :-)

Leslie said...

You are an artist! isn't it funny (not funny ha ha but funny) how God opens and closes doors for us?!! thank God for that actually huh?!! I am glad that he closes some doors when I look back in my life!
by the way, YOUR ART IS BEAUTIFUL!!!

Handbags*N*Pigtails said...

You most definitely ARE alreayd an artist, for sure!
And remember, just because He's closed the doors to this dream so far doesnt mean He'll never open one. Sometimes that perfect timing of His is so hard to wait for.

Tara said...

You are definetly an ARTIST. Love your creations. Follow your heart and trust in the Lord!

Christi said...

You are an artist and I'm so honored to have your art in my home.

My niece asked me what the custom she said piece meant just yesterday. She is 5. I enjoyed telling her about it.

Mary said...

you know i think as artists we crave affirmation. having our work out there, accepted, purchased is part of that.

for me, it's been a growing process...learning that if i don't let God's affirmation of me sink in then i will continue to crave it from those around me and how well my art is accepted.

don't stop dreaming your dream Chrissie, just let God direct it as he sees best. Him timing and plan may be different.

Grace and peace

amy said...

it is soooo funny that you would write this chrissy....whenever i tell someone about you (which is all the time, by the way), about your generosity towards davis and your super awesome heart, i always start by saying, "my friend chrissy, she's an artist ya know, ..."

You are!!

luci said...

aww Chrissie - I am sorry that God said no but you are an artist and He will open new doors for you. x